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Erwin and Cathy
Erwin
Anal Metaphors
As the takeover of my company gets closer and closer to becoming official, I feel comforted knowing that I am no longer the only one bending over and taking it up the ass. Some people are actually taking it harder than I am, getting the big black bitch splitter without the KY, which seems like a pretty painful combo. All of us are getting screwed in the end.
And once all is said and done next week, many of the looser assholes will be thrown to the side, while the ones that still have some tightness in them will continue to act as butt bitches for the company that bought us out. For me, I've been given a career opportunity where I'd start out as just another asshole but eventually become the dick that fucks an asshole.
I digress, all this talk kinda reminds me of this notable Team America quote:
"Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!"
The quote is so true. Our goods are getting plundered in this raping and pillaging, and the men are starting to share their decreasing masculine tidbits. For example, in a meeting to go over our new benefits, my male colleagues were discussing how their gynecologists weren't part of the new health plan.
Please let the suffering end.
