Black Thursday

Fuck work and fuck the company I work for...

Over two years without calling in sick. Covering the functions of those people who did call in. Coming into work early. Leaving work late. The only one in the area who really understood both the technical and the business side of the things that are done...

And still that wasn't enough of an impact to earn a bonus.

I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't for the fact that 45% of the entire workforce got one. The number's pretty significant because at a time when our company's sale is close to being official, a lot of people are going to lose their jobs...and since I fall in the approximate bottom half of the bonus pool, I'm taking that to mean the probability of me sticking around is a lot lower than those who earned a bonus.

It's not about the money - I'm one who believes that if you work your ass off, you should be rewarded for it. This obviously wasn't the case. Instead, you were rewarded if the person making the bonus decision knew who you were (or in corporate speak, "made an impact"). I apologize for going above and beyond what was asked of me as mentioned in my glowing review (which to management means nothing to them). Just goes to show it's not a matter of what you've done, but who you know...

With all the crap that's gone on since I've been where I'm at, I've been the calm force that's kept quiet and done my work. I've never bitched, moaned or complained...ever. I've dreaded working where I am before, but not to this extent, not like this. I'm heartbroken and bitter, and when you start feeling that much despair and hatred, it's time to move on because it's not worth it anymore - there is no more hope.