Entirely Erwin

Planet of the Apes

What are the chances that I stay home to actually watch TV (on a non-wrasslin day mind you) and the normal nighttime lineup is pre-empted by George Bush's State of the Union Address? Is some divine TV power trying to say, "I've given you two signs of the apocalyplse (i.e. The Simple Life and American Idol) and still no one has paid attention to my warnings. The third and final sign will be terrible and will cause much suffering. I unleash...The State of the Union Address. Now feel my wrath beeotch!!!"?

Luckily for me, I was able to soften TV's blow by using the trusty mute button. Just a couple observations:

1. Watching the State of the Union Address is much more bearable and quite amusing muting the TV and listening to the radio instead. It's like watching a really bad samurai Sunday kung-fu movie. For instance, right now, George Bush looks like he's badly lip-syncing I Believe in a Thing Called Love by The Darkness.

2. It's amazing that although it has taken thousands of years to evolve from our primate brethren, Congress has clearly shown that many of us have apes and monkeys as immediate relatives. For instance, George Bush and his cousin, the chimpanzee:



Many times during the Address, El Presidente was interrupted by standing ovations of politicians clapping like wild monkeys. It was all too surreal, much like watching a real-life Planet of the Apes movie. I was sure if I unmuted the TV, I would have heard scores of ooh-ah-ah-oh-ee-ee.

Had I done that though, the world would surely have felt the divine TV power's wrath, and all the world's ass clowns would have faced near-certain extinction. Dammit, another missed opportunity...

Daily Music Review of the Day: Love Song, 311 - Since I like 311, I'm going to keep this short. Today's music is definitely not of the same caliber as that of the past. Case in point - 311 doing a cover of a song by The Cure. The Cure's rendition of Love Song kicks ass. 311's cover of the same song sucks ass